Liam and Mark; Reviewers of Life
Space
By Mark

I have been taken to space. I’m not sure why, or how, but I’m here. Here, in space, theres a lot of floatiness. I know that’s not a word, but that’s what it is. I’m orbiting a large Sphere, but it is not the one that I am so familiar with. Not the one with different grounds and plateaus. This Sphere was large and of one Atmosphere.

I’ve learned quickly that it is difficult to conceive how maddeningly small we are in the grand scheme of the universe. We are the most beautiful screw in a machine that is just as likely to consume us as it is to grant us life. Right now I am a single atom from that screw which has been transferred to a grand new place. And to think, how many atoms I have and lose in a day!

There isn’t a ship. Just floatiness… Of the most peculiar kind.

8.9/10

Space
By Mark

I have been taken to space. I’m not sure why, or how, but I’m here. Here, in space, theres a lot of floatiness. I know that’s not a word, but that’s what it is. I’m orbiting a large Sphere, but it is not the one that I am so familiar with. Not the one with different grounds and plateaus. This Sphere was large and of one Atmosphere.

I’ve learned quickly that it is difficult to conceive how maddeningly small we are in the grand scheme of the universe. We are the most beautiful screw in a machine that is just as likely to consume us as it is to grant us life. Right now I am a single atom from that screw which has been transferred to a grand new place. And to think, how many atoms I have and lose in a day!

There isn’t a ship. Just floatiness… Of the most peculiar kind.

8.9/10

I swear the iPhone goblin is out #shmah?

9.7/10

9.7/10

Mark At Mario Tennis
By Liam



"Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat"
-Mother Teresa
"It’s been…I think it’s about 28 hours since."
-Me In Bed
"Mcdonalds (!) Mcdonalds (!) Kentucky Fried Chicken (!) an’a Pizza Hut! (!)
-I think it was Ronald (?)
"I used to be really good at Mario Tennis man, I was hot shit…but then Mark started to get really good" 
-Me
"He’s thinking about girls, Stomach!"
-Imagination Girls (Memory?)
"He’s definitely a good player…Donkey Kong…good man….goulda band? I’m not sure that’s show right. Oasis got me on the fringe brother"
-ME! (I’m having more fun writing these than the pop culture references) 
llllllllllllllllllllllllooooooooooooooooolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

The Massey’s Day Parade out of (P.S I made that Waluigi collage earlier this week! His clothes are just magazine cutouts, and the background is just two kleenex boxes! :) :) :) If anybody wants to talk about Waluigi or really any Mario related stuff, sent me a message :P I’m also willing to sell the collage too! I’m probably going into graphic design so it might be worth something some day :P Peeeeaaaceeee 

Mark At Mario Tennis

By Liam

"Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat"

-Mother Teresa

"It’s been…I think it’s about 28 hours since."

-Me In Bed

"Mcdonalds (!) Mcdonalds (!) Kentucky Fried Chicken (!) an’a Pizza Hut! (!)

-I think it was Ronald (?)

"I used to be really good at Mario Tennis man, I was hot shit…but then Mark started to get really good" 

-Me

"He’s thinking about girls, Stomach!"

-Imagination Girls (Memory?)

"He’s definitely a good player…Donkey Kong…good man….goulda band? I’m not sure that’s show right. Oasis got me on the fringe brother"

-ME! (I’m having more fun writing these than the pop culture references) 

llllllllllllllllllllllllooooooooooooooooolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

The Massey’s Day Parade out of (P.S I made that Waluigi collage earlier this week! His clothes are just magazine cutouts, and the background is just two kleenex boxes! :) :) :) If anybody wants to talk about Waluigi or really any Mario related stuff, sent me a message :P I’m also willing to sell the collage too! I’m probably going into graphic design so it might be worth something some day :P Peeeeaaaceeee 

Speaking of Planet Earth; Ocean DeepBy Mark and Liam

fuck the ocean, man. Wow. That is an incredible school of dolphins.Like in the middle of nowhere they travel in buttfuck trillions. They&#8217;re fucking space.They are able to do that.like, this looks like make believe.  
I was just about to say &#8220;Life&#8217;s so exciting&#8221;Pelicans. Those little fish get shit on by everyone. This just proves that even birds are more sufficient hunters than humans; birds can just go underneath the water and kill things.Is that a baby sword fish?Yeah.What are you doing bro?Are you writing something?are you taking down what I say?Awww fuck.It&#8217;s like Black Swan but in the water.Whoa, they&#8217;re fucking 8 meters across? You could ride that like a fucking fantasy creature. Oh God, Mark, this is so weird. This is like when SpongeBob goes out of town. They&#8217;re all just fucking weird shapes.Mark, there are spiders underneath the fucking ocean&#8230; whoa it&#8217;s got feathers.  

This is where we abruptly decide to watch Spirited Away instead. Liam: I give it one fish, two fish, ten fish, blue fish.Mark: I am excited to watch Spirited Away and can&#8217;t watch anythbjdjnfjvjl 

Speaking of Planet Earth; Ocean Deep
By Mark and Liam

fuck the ocean, man. 
Wow. That is an incredible school of dolphins.
Like in the middle of nowhere they travel in buttfuck trillions.
They’re fucking space.
They are able to do that.
like, this looks like make believe.  

I was just about to say “Life’s so exciting”
Pelicans. 
Those little fish get shit on by everyone.
This just proves that even birds are more sufficient hunters than humans; birds can just go underneath the water and kill things.
Is that a baby sword fish?
Yeah.
What are you doing bro?
Are you writing something?
are you taking down what I say?
Awww fuck.
It’s like Black Swan but in the water.Whoa, they’re fucking 8 meters across? You could ride that like a fucking fantasy creature.

Oh God, Mark, this is so weird.
This is like when SpongeBob goes out of town. They’re all just fucking weird shapes.
Mark, there are spiders underneath the fucking ocean… whoa it’s got feathers.  

This is where we abruptly decide to watch Spirited Away instead.

 Liam: I give it one fish, two fish, ten fish, blue fish.
Mark: I am excited to watch Spirited Away and can’t watch anythbjdjnfjvjl 

Smells Like Teen Spirit — Casey Abrams
By Mark

Yes, we’ve been gone for a while; yes this is dead space on the internet; whatever I don’t care, I’ve been to busy doing… something… and Liam forgot the password.

Anyways, have you seen the above clip from popular and influential-to-tween television program, American Idol? If you haven’t, I really don’t know if I can suggest watching it. Essentially it consists of a beardy “alternative” contestant playing through the first verse, one chorus and then the “A DEEENIIAAALLLLL” outro. This would be fine, honestly, if it was a consequential performance, if it actually had any authenticity to it. Unfortunately it doesn’t.

What’s more irritating is that this guy is actually talented; his audition for the show was legitimately good. He often plays novelty instruments such as stand up bass with a professional quality, while delivering a smooth jazzy vocal that is hard to deny (well for those against any acceptance of “talent” on American Idol, this is debatable, but give it a shot http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h53sjzphlCI&NR=1&feature=fvwp). The reasoning that makes this possibly one of the worst choices ever for an American Idol song, however, is twofold.

First, the song alienates the middle-aged, pop loving crowd that most likely makes up a substantial amount of the show’s audience. Choosing a Nirvana song in this type of competition is just as advisable as picking a Yoko Ono song; any form of yelling or screeching etc. will cause stocks to plummet, even for the most lovable of beardy-men.

Secondly, and most importantly, is that this was an attempt to “be artistic” and “take a risk”. Here’s the thing, homeslice, if you are going to try and be “authentic” with your Nirvana covers, you don’t pick Smells Like Teen Spirit. Right away you take away that demographic you are aiming for: people who think Nirvana is cool. No one can deny that the song is great, but it’s also the most overplayed, overused song to be “alternative” possibly ever in the history of ever. If he wanted to show me that he had some personality, he could have chosen a Nirvana song that not everyone in the world knows. The worst part is that the bland and uninspired session men backing the kid clearly have no idea what to do with the song. They pretty much cut the balls right off of the song. There is no explosion of distortion, hardly any dissonance other than the dude’s singing, which is probably not on purpose.

I don’t know; this probably is so inconsequential in the history of the world that I just wasted about 30 minutes of my life. But really, man, really you cover Smells Like Teen Spirit? At least one of the dudes in that short lived World Idol thing covered Lithium (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dTW3asaS5sc). While it also is a piece of steaming corporatist shit, at least it’s not Smells Like Teen Spirit.

3/10

Long live Kurt and Rock and Roll, and true art and all that shit/meh.

The Windby Mark.
The wind is my oldest foe. You always push against me.But wind, you try to tell me, to reassure me that you can be my friend.Your forward pushes only last so long.TELL ME!WHY WIND!?Are you the last remaining physical force on Earth that can push me around?Are you a prehistoric remnant of God&#8217;s angry yell?Are you only here to make matters worse?Why can&#8217;t you do fun things?We should go surfing sometime.Or have a picnic.Oh no!The picnic is ruined because the wind came.The wind is only irritating us because whenever he comes along, he is not wanted.His warm heart is slowly cooled by our indifference.Maybe if we loved him, he would love us back.Stupid wind.
4/10

The Wind
by Mark.

The wind is my oldest foe.
You always push against me.
But wind, you try to tell me, to reassure me that you can be my friend.
Your forward pushes only last so long.
TELL ME!
WHY WIND!?
Are you the last remaining physical force on Earth that can push me around?
Are you a prehistoric remnant of God’s angry yell?
Are you only here to make matters worse?
Why can’t you do fun things?
We should go surfing sometime.
Or have a picnic.
Oh no!
The picnic is ruined because the wind came.
The wind is only irritating us because whenever he comes along, he is not wanted.
His warm heart is slowly cooled by our indifference.
Maybe if we loved him, he would love us back.
Stupid wind.

4/10

Mark&#8217;s Albums of the Year
I am too lazy to both write explanations and to try and catch up with this year in music any more than I have tried in the past 2 weeks. So; here is my ill informed list&#8230;
1. Zeus - Say Us2. Arcade Fire - The Suburbs3. Janelle Monae - The ArchAndroid4. Broken Social Scene - Forgiveness Rock Record5. Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy6. Wavves - King of the Beach (tie)6. Best Coast - Crazy For You (tie)7. Serena Maneesh - Abyss in B Minor8. Young Rival - LP9. of Montreal - False Priest10. Erykah Badu - New Amerykah Part IIranking after #5 is fairly arbitrary.

Mark’s Albums of the Year

I am too lazy to both write explanations and to try and catch up with this year in music any more than I have tried in the past 2 weeks. So; here is my ill informed list…

1. Zeus - Say Us
2. Arcade Fire - The Suburbs
3. Janelle Monae - The ArchAndroid
4. Broken Social Scene - Forgiveness Rock Record
5. Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
6. Wavves - King of the Beach (tie)
6. Best Coast - Crazy For You (tie)
7. Serena Maneesh - Abyss in B Minor
8. Young Rival - LP
9. of Montreal - False Priest
10. Erykah Badu - New Amerykah Part II

ranking after #5 is fairly arbitrary.

Favourite Tracks of 2010 Part 2

Monster – Kanye West
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ona42jz8w0k (hopefully this remains audio of the real song; Kanye has most of these taken down)

Not wanting to repeat artists on this list, I had a hard time picking between Monster and Dark Fantasy. Monster wins on its sheer grandeur and impossibility. How is this even pop music? It’s so massive that I can’t even imagine most people listening to it, and yet it reached the top 20 on the Billboard Chart. The chorus, first off, is proof that Kanye doesn’t need anyone to do his hooks for him. Also, the fact that Jay-Z and Nicki Minaj drop their best verses of the year on the track proves to me that most rappers do their greatest work with Kanye at the helm. The Bon Iver led outro is dumb and unnecessary, but still, that he even got in on it is a testament to the range Kanye attempts in this track. Boundaries clearly mean nothing; if Kanye wants something he gets it, even if it makes no sense to anyone else.

Marching Through Your Head – Zeus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oc4qnM9rcVo (ignore the meh video; skip to 1:00 for music to start)

OK; technically this song was first released on the “Sounds Like Zeus EP” in 2009, but since it also appeared on the 2010 album “Say Us” I think it’s fair game. This song is just one of the gems found on that latter album, and maybe the only reason I like it over those songs is its brevity. It comes and goes so fast, constantly adding upon itself with layered touches that it is hard to keep up. Every trick in the Zeus cannon is used here; the harmonies, the jangling piano, stop start dynamics, all condensed into a neat 2 and a half minutes that makes it hard to wonder why these guys aren’t a significant amount more popular. If you listen to any new band this year, make it Zeus.

Texico Bitches – Broken Social Scene
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MTfNTzuJTJU 

Oh Broken Social Scene, my one hope for the year. While your album was not necessarily a disappointment, it was definitely not the same band that made my decade-favourites “You Forgot It In People” and “Broken Social Scene”. Still, the new Broken Social Scene could be great, and this song is a good example of that. Cutting down the fat in this case works very well; essentially you’re left with a four minute pop song with a “whoo”-inclusive chorus, and enough of that cluttered sound remaining to keep it interesting. If every song was as light and catchy as this one, the album would be a stunner, but instead it plods with some slower moments. Plus, can I just say Justin Peroff is the hero of Broken Social Scene; drumming here is impeccable.

Odessa – Caribou
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiSa7THgxrI

I should probably listen to this song more often considering it is incredibly well crafted and fun to listen to. Unfortunately, like most music on this list though I was late to the party. Still, the difference between this and anything on Andorra is jarring, in a good way.


Fuck You – Cee-Lo Green
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAV0XrbEwNc&has_verified=1

Sometimes songs are everywhere for a good reason. Yes it’s bordering on novelty;  yes you have to look past the vomit-inducing Bruno Mars association, but fuck, it’s so cathartic that it’s hard not to either a) sing along or b) smile just a little bit (at least upon the first listen). Also, on another note, “Forget You” is the worst ever radio edit of a song. Will it win the Grammy? Who the fuck cares. If it doesn’t I’m expecting a Grammy edit heavily lambasting the world’s worst awards show.

All My Hate and My Hexes Are For You—Crocodiles
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XKcXVAAwOs

Sometimes (often) simplicity is the key to my heart, and that’s what happens on the closing song to Crocodile’s solid “Sleep Forever”. The previous song cross-fades into Hexes’ drum machine and organ, and when the vocal melody comes in so innocently, it hits like a brick. This song sounds like it could have been released any time in the past 25 years, and not in the faux-80s produced way employed by some, but in its universal minimalism and its gorgeous chorus that sounds so unworried that it could be hundreds of other songs. I feel like I’ve heard it before, but I can’t place it. All I know is that whatever it sounds like must be amazing, because this song is as well.

Turn Me Away (Get Munny) – Erykah Badu
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Y9TY_pSLzg

Compared to my favourite track off of “New Amerykah Part One” (Soldier), Turn Me Away is a complete 180 degree turn for Badu. It’s the funkiness of the song that wins me over; that and the off kilter performance by her that seems like it gets more off key as the song progresses. The political strife of that first album is replaced by the more personal and lighthearted view of this album, and to good effect. Badu hasn’t sounded this easygoing and fun loving in some time (if ever?). Politics is all well and good, but sometimes you just wanna groove; this song accomplishes that.


Famine Affair – of Montreal
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2dHheEgYDA

I listened to of Montreal’s new album months after it was released; a sin that Mark from 2 years ago would have hit present Mark for. Still, at least I got to it, and that means I got to this song as well. Kevin Barnes seemed to have turned his back on rational song structures with his last album, but this song is so simple and effortless you would wonder why he tries to sound like Prince more often than accomplishing something so fulfilling as Famine Affair. In 3 simple parts the song alternates between a simple bass-drum-guitar riff, a full on disco attack, and a near perfect chorus plucked straight from Pablo Honey-era Radiohead. It’s a shame that the song doesn’t give itself room to repeat some parts, but that’s one of the joys of the song: playing it on repeat is not difficult.

P.S. yeah, ladies sometimes you suck as well.

I Just Want to See Your Face – Serena Maneesh
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-IPw9mv-J4 (video adds 45 seconds of noise to the beginning of the song)

Wow does this song sound a shit-load like My Bloody Valentine. This is a good thing since it is like MBV at their best (do they have a worst?). The vocals just keep going, and the whole song really doesn’t give the listener a break, but for two extremely short minutes it is a comparative island of pop after album opener and ear-bleeder Ayisha Abyss. I like my shoegaze fast and sweet; and if this isn’t a good epitome of such prerequisites then I don’t know what is.

No Future Part Three: Escape From No Future—Titus Andronicus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzjuA4RgSDk

Sometimes a song can get ingrained in your head in odd ways. Take, for example, a roommate who really enjoys playing his acoustic guitar and singing a song from a band you’ve never heard of. Well, after a few months of hearing the chorus of “You will always be a loser” without having heard the actual song, I finally took the dive. What I got is something that was very close to what I was promised of Titus Andronicus; some sort of hybrid between Bruce Springsteen and Neutral Milk Hotel. It will always remain attached to that lone voice singing with the acoustic guitar, though, and has a deeper meaning that way. It’s a song that has been adopted into my life through living with someone; quite an odd experience, but still, makes for a powerful song.

————————————————————————————————————-

Special awesome video inclusion:

Duck Sauce- Barbra Streisand
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uu_zwdmz0hE

whoooo-ooo-o-o-o-o-oo-o-o-ooo-oo x 50

Favourite Tracks of 2010 Part 1

by Mark

Les Savy Fav—Let’s Get Out of Here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mrvtu0Dw8rg&feature=fvsr

This is probably one of the most “any band could do this” tracks on this list. Forgive me for getting sentimental or personal, but this song just hit me one day. This song is the feeling of walking down a street in a city you feel like leaving, wanting to leave everything behind to fix something that’s been nagging you incessantly. “Don’t care about friends of mine… I just want you to want me, right now,” sounds near desperate, and then the chorus of “Let’s get out of here” is yelled many, many times, and I almost believe that life could be solved so simply.

Joanna Newsom—Good Intentions Paving Company
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCCl3nzL5PI

Joanna Newsom’s voice is “weird.” This is pretty much the deal breaker in her music. I for one like her voice; it is one that seems singular in a sea of cute voiced female singer-songwriters. Her arrangements are what grab me as a listener, however. Good Intentions Paving Company is a perfect example of how far good arrangements can bring a song that relies on no choruses. For a seven minute song, it definitely seems shorter, probably because it is always changing. The harmonies, the drums, the driving piano; everything seems placed somewhere for a reason, all held together by that polarizing voice. What makes this song so thrilling is its utter dependence on the history of American music, yet it is also such a distinct statement, one that wholly belongs to its creator. It’s the song that has remained atop of my most played songs of this year, but really I can’t even fully explain why; it intrigues me, luring me back over and over.

Janelle Monae—Tightrope
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMyc148Do_Q

Tightrope doesn’t epitomize everything about Janelle Monae. If anything, it gives one extreme of her fractured android character. That being said, it’s still probably the best song off of her often amazing debut album The ArchAndroid. It somehow shoots for James Brown backed by Outkast (Big Boi guests on the track) at the same time as sounding like a bizarro James Bond theme. The version I first heard was the live version she performed on Letterman, and it still remains a shockingly good introduction to Monae, and the best version of this song. Only here do you get the whole package of Monae; the freakishly apt dancing, delivered while remaining a wildly charismatic live singer who is as concerned with the visual appeal of herself as she is with her musical integrity. In a perfect world, she might be the next Beyonce, but seeing as she’s from the year 2719, we’ll probably have to wait a bit.

First Rate People—Girl’s Night
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVsuoN2DIXw

The amount of times this song has been stuck in my head must be a testament to how good it is. At its heart is a triad of impeccably catchy and overlapping vocal melodies, each of which has the capability of taking your brain by force. What First Rate People also know is that having a good melody also requires deft application and support. Changing instrumentals float around the steady drum sample and guitar until suddenly the song trails off. The band knows that keeping it short is a good trick; coming back for more is a must, often right after the initial listen.

She and Him—In the Sun
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZ3cTwI9bIw (note; inclusion is connected to the awesomeness of the music video)

Full disclosure; I have a gigantic crush on Zooey Deschanel. It’s just too damn hard to not like her. I really can’t tell if it’s the schoolboy crush working me over on this one, but her band with M. Ward is also very good. She and Him don’t work as well in an album format as I would like them to, however. They far too often will rest on covers and recycling the same idea over to make it through a 14 song album. Sometimes, though, they hit that perfect sweet spot of AM pop. In the Sun particularly gets my vote due to the video, which seems to always make me smile. I know this could be seen as a weak choice or not as deserving as another song, but when happiness comes this prepackaged it’s hard to not fall for it.


Arcade Fire—Sprawl II (Mountains Beyond Mountains)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rH_7_XRfTMs

On an album where it is difficult to tell whether Arcade Fire are with you or against you, Sprawl II does the best job of assuring you that, in the end, they are with you. The feeling of growing up in a place that doesn’t fit what you are is not an uncommon arch that runs through art, but Arcade Fire always comes up with the stark imagery that hits home. The suburbs are a place where people go to live (or die). That’s pretty much it. Being a kid growing up in one of these communities, it’s not hard to connect with the protagonist’s difficulties finding purpose in a place that is meant to have no real purpose; the place where the best entertainment is an ever-growing assortment of dead shopping malls. I know most of my friends got away from the sprawl, and those who didn’t probably wish they did.

Musically, this visualization is made even more poignant by Régine Chassagne’s vocals; vocals that ooze the desperation of someone trapped. Her songs on Arcade Fire albums are often highlights, but here she completely overshadows her ever worsening husband. This song is the sound of something blooming; of childhood blooming into adulthood and of an inkling blooming into realization.